The first time I tried meth I was riding on the back of a motorcycle with Sara and it made me feel powerful and free. The next week I moved in with Sara and we began our life together - Sara, me and my daughter Amber. Sara worked nights at the Walmart so I was alone with Amber much of the time that summer and living off the money from my divorce.
On Friday nights I would leave Amber at her daddy's house and Sara and I would go out dancing and partying for the whole weekend. A bump from Sara's stash for the night shifts, here and there, would keep us going. When Sunday came I would fight with Sara because she wanted to sleep and I wanted to keep going - so eventually I let Sara sleep and I would disappear, sometimes for a few days, to party and get into some crazy shit. When I got home I got into violent fights with Sara and I would not have any money left for lunches and school supplies for my daughter.
One weekend Amber didn't come back and her daddy told me to get lost or he would take me to court. Shortly after that Sara kicked me out and I found myself in a women's shelter wondering what had happened. In the shelter I learned that I was addicted, but that there was a solution and hope for me to recover. I got into a program that helped me to deal with my addiction and life in general. I learned about how to have more healthy relationships, how to be a better parent and how to stand on my own two feet.
I got my daughter back and she is the joy in my life along with the women I have been able to help at our weekly groups. When I can be of service by helping another woman to put her life back together it makes me feel really useful and I forget about all my own little problems.